ABAD Day 2: On Happiness

I'm glad I made it today...Woohoo, day 2!!! 

First, I am thankful that this challenge lets me think deep and hard about the things I believe in and the things am learning and those that I already know so I can make shifts and changes in my thoughts and belief systems as necessary. 

This is the second day of own version of a blog a day (hence, ABAD) challenge. I am inspired by a new friend to take on the challenge and since almost every writer asks about what to write, there might be times that my posts would be inspired by hers and whatever differences in opinion that we have is not meant to attack or discredit anyone's position or opinion.

Second, plain and simple truth is this is Bethylicious thinking out loud. As much as I would like to moderate and carefully consider each word that would be published here, there is always the risk of other people interpreting what has been written in a different tone and manner that was intended by the writer. Comments are welcome and Qs as well as long as they are non-offensive and can help me, the writer or anyone else reading understand further and for all of us to learn more. Topics and suggestions are also very much welcome.

Third, kiddin'! No more, we now move on to what I came here to write about today which is happiness.

We all want it. This is the universal and generic goal of every normal person: to be happy. So, how to? The short answer is  "be". In order to be happy, make the choice to be happy and do the things that make you happy. Make it a habit to see the good side of every situation no matter how difficult. Stop preparing yourself for a transformation to someone who is happier. Metamorphose now, take that leap and elevate yourself to a higher level of consciousness and eventually, higher level of happiness.  

Positivity is priceless: Happiness at Harvard

Isn't it a wonder that the more we achieve in life, the more we progress as a society, the lonelier we are. One of the most popular courses in Harvard in recent years has been Positive Psychology - one that deals basically with what makes us happy. Oh yeah, there is a science of happiness.

Money is not a key to happiness. Never has been. The most interesting proof of this is the 5-word conclusion of the Grant Study:

"Happiness is love. Full stop." ~George Vaillant

The Grant Study was launched in 1938 and followed the lives of over 250 Ivy League undergraduates for the next 75 years. Vaillant directed the last 3 decades of the research.  

One out of every 5 students in Harvard lined up for Tal-Ben Shahar's class. I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to read one of his books and my take away is this: to be happy you have to strike a balance between fulfilling your current needs and desires and achieving future wants.

“Happiness lies at the intersection between pleasure and meaning. Whether at work or at home, the goal is to engage in activities that are both personally significant and enjoyable.” ~Tal-Ben Shahar

Seems, easy does it? Well, the theories are always the easiest, its the application that leave us empty-handed, most of the time. However, don't despair there are things we can do to make us happy. 

Apart from simply doing, we must make it a daily routine, an exercise, a ritual for it to be deeply embedded in our system so we can change our perception and the way we see things.

"See what we're finding is it's not necessarily the reality that shapes us, but the lens through which your brain views the world that shapes your reality." ~Shawn Achor 

Make Happy a Habit

As I was writing this piece, I received an email notification from one of the guys I follow and read: Leo Babauta and it prompted me to think on how this post will end. I read his post and reflected on the things I am currently practicing in my life and what makes me happy and so here it goes:

1. Gratitude. There is nothing more rewarding that knowing you have been very much blessed and that the more you give thanks, the more you seem to receive. I have seen this time in again not just from friends and family but have personally experienced this. In her book Thank You Power, Deborah Norville not only showed in inspiring stories how gratitude can change one's life but also showed research evidence that being thankful allows us to be happier.
2. Random Acts of Kindness. Helping someone, even in the littlest way possible is guaranteed to make you happy. Instead of ranting and blaming, shut up and do the work. You might be surprised to catch yourself smiling afterwards. Not only does this  relieve one from stress of not having things done, or perhaps the guilt of just simply watching it happen, it also feels good to know you did something that helped someone in someway. 
3. Initiative and Service. In being true to my inner Fred, this is something I continually do, as if it were second nature. I want to be someone who makes a change have an impact in anything I do with anyone I meet or work with. Evolution allows us...actually requires us to change with the times and reinvent ourselves and with the changes I've been through, service has always been constant.
4. Personal Leadership. Oh yeah, in order for us to live a life that we desire and make the change and impact we want to leave in the world, we definitely need a lot of this and I know you would all agree with me. Mark Sanborn has named plenty of heroes, leaders in their own right who does not have titles and all that crap but continue to show leadership to the highest degree. I think this is one form of leadership we all need to master before we go out to lead somewhere.
5. Quiet Moments. Noise comes in different forms these days and its hard to find a quiet moment not unless of course you go to an island without a mobile signal, then you can really find a quiet place. So its important for me to find some quiet time to be happy. Quiet moments, no matter how brief they are can certainly do anyone some good. It gives us time to reassess our priorities, count our blessings and mostly rest our weary hearts and heads. I think I already mentioned it in another blog, but its very important that our brains get freed up in order for us to accommodate new information and be more creative.
6. Authenticity. Authenticity has a sibling and its called Liberty. We are at our happiest when we can truly be ourselves minus fears that holds us back and other inhibitions. With our genuine self, we can be free to express who we really are but this does not, in under any circumstance promote anarchy, disorder or chaos. It is simply being honest with yourself and those around you.  

Be happy and make it a habit!